Speaking Info » Delivery Skills

When Speaking Don’t Worry About Eye-Contact

Arlen Busenitz — Mon, 19 Mar 2012 15:45:50 +0000

Nearly every book on public speaking has a chapter or page on the importance of eye-contact.

Authors and speech coaches claim:

Eye contact will connect you with the audience
Eye-contact will make you look confident
Eye-Contact will help hold attention

I used to be a big proponent of emphasizing the importance of eye-contact when speaking.

Not anymore.

I still believe that good eye-contact is crucial. However, our focus should not be on eye contact but on this principle:

Talk to one person for 3-8 seconds.

Look at someone and deliver a sentence or two. Have a mini-conversation with them for a few moments. Ignore everyone else and speak directly to them.

Speak in terms that make them feel like you are speaking directly to them. Craig Valentine says, “Speak to them like you were talking to them in a hallway.” If I met you in the hallway, I would not say “Each of you can reach your goals”. I would say, “You can reach your goals”.

Keep your voice conversational. Sometime as speakers we get into our “preacher’s voice”. Would you use this voice if you met someone in the hallway? Nope. Keep it coversational.

Several benefits of applying this principle and Talking to one person for 3-8 seconds.

Benefit #1: You will make good eye-contact (Yes! This is important)
Benefit #2: They feel like we are speaking to them, will listen better, and feel more connected.
Benefit #3: The people sitting around the person will feel like you are talking to them.

More info on how to do this in Become a Better Speaker in One Evening.

Move beyond eye-contact. Focus on talking to one person for 3-8 seconds.

Arlen Busenitz

Arlen Busenitz is an experienced speaker with over 650 presentations. He is Author of several books, CD's,and creator of Become a Better Speaker in One Evening™

More Posts - Website

How to Captivate the Audience with Poor Delivery Skills

Arlen Busenitz — Tue, 27 Sep 2011 08:14:11 +0000

"If you want to captivate the audience and keep them on the edge of their seats, you must have dynamic delivery skills."

Have you heard this statement? Is it really true? In the past three weeks, I saw two speakers keep the audience on the edge of their seats despite poor delivery skills. Why? I wondered the same thing until the answer flashed into my mind a few days later.

The first speaker we’ll call Mr. Monotone. His voice was as flat as the roads of KS. He did move some and had OK eye contact, but his voice was stuck in one pitch. Normally his delivery skills would have put the audience to sleep, but all 300 people hung on his every word. Why? Keep reading.

The second speaker was at a different event with a room full of 90+ people. Let’s call him Mr. No Eye-Contact. I don’t want to be disrespectful, but I have never seen someone make such poor eye contact. He never once looked at his notes, because he did not have any!

Where did he look? The inside of his eyelids. His eyes were closed at least 90% of the time. I am not exaggerating!

But again, the audience was with him every sentence of the way. Why did these two speakers with poor deliver skills have such a tremendous connection with the audience?

Simple.

If a hungry audience is fed by a top chef, they listen intently.

This is the winning formula. Vocal variety, stage presence, and eye contact are all helpful. However, as I witnessed, they are not critically important when the speaker is feeding a hungry crowd

Mr Monotone had made millions on the internet and was addressing a roomful of internet marketers wanting to increase their income.

Audience hungry for info on how to make money.
Expert and credible speaker showing them how.

Mr. No Eye-Contact was a top expert in the health/nutrition field. The audience was made up of individuals hungry for information to improve their health. Again a winning formula.

Because both speakers were top chef’s or experts in their topics, this increased the hunger of the audience and they felt more satisfied.

Hungry Audience + Credible and Expert Speaker delivering satisfying content = Audience on the edge of their seats.

Both speakers are highly paid and popular, not because of their delivery skills, but because they are feeding hungry audiences.

How can we apply this:

Choose topics your audience is hungry for.
Speak in the areas you have expertise in.
Let it slip out that you are a top chef in your topic area. Put it in your introduction. Slip in a few self-praises in a humble way.

Delivery skills are very important, but you can hold attention if you find a hungry audience and feed them well.

Arlen Busenitz

Arlen Busenitz is an experienced speaker with over 650 presentations. He is Author of several books, CD's,and creator of Become a Better Speaker in One Evening™

More Posts - Website

Tip #9 Does the Audience Feel like You are Speaking to them? – Part 2

Arlen Busenitz — Fri, 16 Sep 2011 20:15:51 +0000

Yesterday, you learned the power of speaking to one person. Another powerful delivery tip is to use the word “you”

Compare these two questions:

“How many have been to New York City?”

“Have you visited New York City?”

The second question is much more personal and the audience member will feel like you are speaking to them. After asking this, you would pause to let people mentally answer yes or no.

Presentation Tip #9: Use the word “You” frequently and reword general questions and statements.

Skim through your presentation and insert the word you when appropriate. When you get to a general statement or question, ask, “How would I word this if I was visiting with someone in the hallway.” Craig Valentine calls this the hall way test.

We would never say to someone in the hallway, “Who here has vacationed in Mexico?”

Instead we would say, “Have you vacationed in Mexico?”

Notice the difference?

Also watch out for what Darren Lacroix calls the “You / I ratio”. We should be using the word “You” much more than the word “I”.

Use the word “You” frequently and it’ll help you connect with and impact the audience.

Arlen Busenitz

Arlen Busenitz is an experienced speaker with over 650 presentations. He is Author of several books, CD's,and creator of Become a Better Speaker in One Evening™

More Posts - Website

Tip #8: Does the Audience Feel like You are Speaking to them? – Part 1

Arlen Busenitz — Fri, 16 Sep 2011 08:16:37 +0000

We know we have made a connection when people say “You were talking right to me!”

How can we achieve this connection? This next speaking tip will help.

Speaking Tip #8: Speak to One Person

Good public speaking is all about having 5 to 8 second conversations with each person. Look at the individual and deliver a thought or couple sentences. Do this and you will make an incredible connection with the audience. Read more on speaking to one person

Arlen Busenitz

Arlen Busenitz is an experienced speaker with over 650 presentations. He is Author of several books, CD's,and creator of Become a Better Speaker in One Evening™

More Posts - Website

Tip #6: 95% of Speakers Make this Mistake

Arlen Busenitz — Thu, 15 Sep 2011 08:16:10 +0000

Winston Churchill was a powerful speaker. He inspired millions and changed the outcome of history. He also mastered the power of the pause. The majority of speakers do not use this effectively.

Soon after I started recording my presentations, I realized I was under utilizing this important speaking tip.

Speaking Tip #6: Pause before and after an important point or word.

Pausing causes the audience to reflect. Pausing breaks up the monotony of the presentation. Pausing creates anticipation for the next phrase.

Consider these examples.

The secret to reaching your goals is…persistence …

When it come to holding attention, that speaker is a 10…out of 100 …

As Winston Churchill Said, … “Never, never, never give up.” …

During rehearsal I will often mentally count ” 1, 2, 3, 4″ when I should pause. This exercise will help make pausing a natural part of your public speaking skills toolbox. You will join the 5% who speak like Churchill.

Arlen Busenitz

Arlen Busenitz is an experienced speaker with over 650 presentations. He is Author of several books, CD's,and creator of Become a Better Speaker in One Evening™

More Posts - Website

The Speaker who Bored Me to Sleep

Arlen Busenitz — Tue, 13 Sep 2011 20:44:59 +0000

It was 20 minutes into the presentation and boredom hung like heavy smoke. Some individuals were fighting to stay awake. Others sought to stay polite, and not walk out.

Mr. Bordon continue to drone on and on. His message took off like a plane from the podium, crashed, and burned before it reached the front row. A few sentences that made it to the audience floated right past the audience’s ear and bit the dust.

Though I felt like sleeping, I tried to stay awake to analyze why Mr. Boredom was having this negative hypnotic experience on the room. Unfortunately, it reminded me of how I have also been boring at times because I have made three mistakes.

Here are three mistakes he was making and ones we should avoid as speakers.

Mistake #1: He was reading 90% of the time

Think of our eye contact as being like a curtain between the speaker and the audience. When the speaker is looking at the audience, the curtain is open. When their eyes are glued to the notes, the curtain is closed and connection is being lost with the audience.

A few second glances now and then are acceptable, but if that curtain is closed at least 30% of the time, your audience may rebel and lose attention.

Know your speech and just use a few phrases to jog your memory.

Mistake #2: He was bored with the material

If the speaker is bored, the audience will be also. Fascinating fact, isn’t it. We must choose topics that we can get excited about. What if we don’t like our topic? Act excited anyways. That enthusiasm will transfer.

Mistake #3: He had a monotone message, voice, and body language

Think of a great peace of classical music. The music speeds up and slows down. The volume is high and low. That variation keeps our attention. Our message should vary also. Sometimes, we tell facts and other times stories. Our voice should be fast and sometimes slow.

When it comes to body language, lets change it up. Step out of the podium box on certain points. Raise the hands. Step forward or maybe step back at times.

Being a boring speaker can be suicide to a speaking career and hinder our job advancement. Don’t make these mistakes and you can keep the audience on the edge of their seats.

http://www.SpeakingInfo.com

Arlen Busenitz

Arlen Busenitz is an experienced speaker with over 650 presentations. He is Author of several books, CD's,and creator of Become a Better Speaker in One Evening™

More Posts - Website

Eye Contact & Peanut Butter

Arlen Busenitz — Mon, 12 Sep 2011 08:16:45 +0000

Eye contact and Peanut butter? Yes, those two are related. Let me explain.

In March of 2004, I was speaking to an audience. If you had been standing with me in the back of the room after the presentation, you would have seen a white haired, elderly lady walk up to me.

Boldly, she said, “You were looking right at me!” For a moment I was taken back because I thought she was upset! She went on, “I felt like you were looking at me the whole time. That’s ok.”

I knew I was not looking at her the whole time, because I was spreading it around.

I’ve never forgot the experience nor the lesson I learned. “Eye contact is powerful.”

As a speaker we want people to feel like we are talking to them. Not in an uncomfortable way, but in a way that connects.

How can you make people feel like you are talking right to them?

Three words. Make eye contact.

Eye contact helps connect us with the audience, keeps the audiences attention, and cements the message in the minds of the audience.

So what does eye contact have to do with peanut butter?

First, eye contact should be sticky, just like peanut butter.

Have you seen wall gazing speakers? They just look at the walls. Or how about “Stare in space” speakers. The audience is outer space and they just kind of stare out.

Unfortunately, I have done both.

We don’t want to be like that. We our eyes to stick with audience members for around 5-8 seconds. Just enough time to deliver a thought and let the member bask in the glow of our attention. They will feel like we are speaking right to them.

Don’t do it too long! We don’t want to stare them down!

Second, eye contact should be spread around-just like peanut butter.

Imagine eating a slice of whole wheat bread where all the peanut butter is crammed in one corner. 75% of the bread would taste dry and the corner would be overpowering.

Same principle applies to eye contact. Spread it around the audience. Hit the front row, the back grow, the sides, the middle, and everywhere in between.

My problem is that I sometimes have eye contact patterns that leave out part of the room. By watching video tapes of myself and being aware of how I speak, I have discovered areas of the room that I used to hardly touch.

Watch yourself on video and notice your eye patterns.

Don’t leave one part of the audience uncovered! Spread the eye contact around.

Next time you speak, keep your eye contact sticky and spread it around to all corners of the room.

Arlen Busenitz

Arlen Busenitz is an experienced speaker with over 650 presentations. He is Author of several books, CD's,and creator of Become a Better Speaker in One Evening™

More Posts - Website

Tip #15: Who to Deliver Your Opening Line to

Arlen Busenitz — Tue, 30 Aug 2011 20:17:44 +0000

Last week I heard a great tip from Daren Lacroix, the 2001 World Champion of Public Speaking

Delivery Tip #15: Deliver your opening line to a person on the back row. You'll instantly bring the back row into your speech. This will also bring in the rest of the audience as our eye contact flies over their heads towards the back row. Then we jump into our Figure 8 eye contact pattern or whichever patter you want to use. Combine this public speaking tip with the Hook & Reel Intro and you'll have a powerful opening.

Arlen Busenitz

Arlen Busenitz is an experienced speaker with over 650 presentations. He is Author of several books, CD's,and creator of Become a Better Speaker in One Evening™

More Posts - Website

Best Public Speaking Tip for Connecting with the Audience

Arlen Busenitz — Fri, 19 Aug 2011 20:15:44 +0000

As a speaker we want to connect with the audience. We want them to feel like we are speaking to each person and having a conversation with them.

How do we connect with the audience? This video will show you one of the best public speaking tips for connecting with the audience.

[youtube]http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=kmNy0PqPbkY[/youtube]

Feel free to comment!

http://www.speakinginfo.com

Arlen Busenitz

Arlen Busenitz is an experienced speaker with over 650 presentations. He is Author of several books, CD's,and creator of Become a Better Speaker in One Evening™

More Posts - Website

Best Public Speaking Tips for Beginner Speakers (& Experienced) – Part 2

Arlen Busenitz — Tue, 16 Aug 2011 08:18:16 +0000

In part one I showed you how Joe should prepare as if only one person was in the room. This same concept should apply when speaking.

Speak to one person at a time.

Craig Valentine says, “Speak to one, but look to all.”

You and I should be having 5-10 second conversations with people in the room. We’ll deliver a couple sentences or one thought to the dark haired individual in the front row. Then we deliver the next few lines to the individual in the back row. We keep to doing this with audience members around the room.

What will happen? Members of the audience will feel like we are speaking right to them. Every speaking book and course hammers home the idea of making eye contact for around 5 seconds.

This tip goes well beyond that. You are not just making eye contact, you are having a conversation with that individual.

Do this and you and I will connect with the audience and stand out from most speakers. A lot of speakers will just talk to the room. Have you seen it? They speak to one side of the room and then the other, but their eyes never lock on an individual.

You can be different. Speak to one person at a time and you will connect and create a positive audience experience.

Arlen Busenitz

Arlen Busenitz is an experienced speaker with over 650 presentations. He is Author of several books, CD's,and creator of Become a Better Speaker in One Evening™

More Posts - Website